Commenting About Other People's Bodies
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A useful guide to commenting about other people’s bodies.
For this week’s Culture Drop I’m sharing an exhaustive list of everything that’s ok to comment about other people’s bodies. Here we go:
End of list.
That’s it. Nothing. Do not comment on other people’s bodies, period. It’s so simple.
Let’s unpack this.
Internal thoughts vs. outside thoughts
“Here’s the thing: you’re human. You’re going to have opinions about how other people look.”
Here’s the thing: you’re human. You’re going to have opinions about how other people look. Whether someone is fat, thin, muscular, pregnant, attractive, has had plastic surgery, etc, etc, etc. Your brain will notice and form thoughts around these things. That’s normal.
And here’s the other, more important thing: those thoughts are for you and your brain only. They are inside thoughts. The moment you let those thoughts escape your mouth, whether it’s to that person directly, or to someone else about that person — whether as judgment, praise, or criticism, you’ve crossed a line. It doesn’t matter of it’s a coworker, stranger, family member, just don’t do it.
Why this matters
It’s none of your business. Other people’s bodies and what they look like have nothing to do with you, and it’s not your business to comment about. Period.
It’s harmful. Making comments, even well-intentioned ones, can cause a lot of hurt. Praising someone’s weight loss, for example, might unintentionally reinforce unhealthy habits or disordered eating. And making comments that are cruel is a pretty shitty way to behave as a human.
It’s unnecessary. Sharing your opinions about what others look like serves no valuable purpose. Often it’s done in judgement and with cruel intentions, and even when it’s not it can have the same impact. There’s no need for it. There are so many other ways to connect with people.
This is especially true in professional settings. Whether you’re a colleague, boss, or peer, body talk has no place in the workplace. It’s distracting, disrespectful, and often veers into harassment territory.
Keep it simple: When it comes to talking about other people’s bodies, here’s a very handy rule to remember: don’t say it.
So, what can you say instead?
If it’s meant to be cruel then don’t say anything at all.
“People value recognition for their character, accomplishments, and kindness far more than appearance-based validation.”
And if it’s meant to be kind, here’s a radical idea: comment and compliment things that actually matter. People value recognition for their character, accomplishments, and kindness far more than appearance-based validation.
If the thought in your head is about someone else’s body, don’t say it. Not to your family. Not to your friends. Not to strangers on the internet.
Let’s collectively stop this cycle of unnecessary, harmful commentary. It has always been, and will always be none of your business.
Related Blogs:
How To Shut Down Toxic Talk, Gossip, & Bullsh*t
Bring Out the Best in Other People
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This article was created by Galen Emanuele for the #culturedrop. Free leadership and team culture content in less than 5 minutes a week. Check out the rest of this month's content and subscribe to the Culture Drop at https://bit.ly/culturedrop
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